Death knocked on my family’s door, even though
it has knocked before we knew it was coming back. The hoped was to hold the
door closed for a few more minutes, hours, days or years. This time the door
was opened, and it came to end suffering and pain. In a moment she was gone and
in its place was an unending sadness and void. We scramble to find some sort of
reason or order to explain how one can move forward and which way to go.
We lost a mother, wife and friend. Loved ones come and go showing
condolences and expressing the love she gave them. There is phone calls, cards
and flowers that can fill a house or a room with condolences, but they never
fill the void.
Time .....it will take
only time is some of the most common words to be spoken. Yet your heart still
has this void. There is so much you would have said or done if you knew that
it might be the last time u see each other. My heart hurts and is sad,
and I ask again how does one move forward from this open door.
I sit and pray:
"Father bring me
into your light and peace. Take my broken heart and help me grieve. Wrap me in
the palm of your hand and bring a wave of tranquility to my family during this
time. Let each and every one who is touched by this loss receive this comfort
and peace also. Help each of us honor her life and close the door for now,
knowing that we will see each other again."
"Blessed are those
who mourn, for they shall be comforted"
(Matthew 5:4 - New King
James Version)
"The Lord is near
to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite
spirit."
(Psalm 34:18 - New King
James Version)
"He heals the
brokenhearted and binds up their wounds"
(Psalm 147:3 - New King
James Version)
I know that death is not
the end but a part of the journey and one day we shall meet again in the house
of our father. Until then I will remember in joy my time spent with her,
cherish those memories and leave the door closed, until God opens it
again.
©Jasmin Roussy
